Stuff & Nonsense – Page 4

Things I Wish I’d Said

admin March 28, 2021 No Comments

Been thinking about Uncle Ben’s Rice the last couple days. I used to eat it quite a lot. It was so much easier to make than Mexican rice and I am nothing if not a lazy ass Mexican. I can say that, wypipo, not you. The other day I blathered on a podcast about […]

As Heaven Is Wide

admin March 3, 2021 No Comments

I don’t really know where this is going, I only know I need to write or I might not survive to the next minute. It was a strange dream I woke from this morning: The Gorgeous Blonde turned on the coffee and packed her bags. I knew that was her plan because I slept […]

Bonjour

admin February 23, 2021 No Comments

I’ve been thinking a lot about Paris lately. In high school I read about all the best writers spending time there, writing, finding their voice. That my favorite book was written by a Frenchman only added to my fascination. I was convinced all the women looked like Isabelle Adjani. At nineteen, wandering through this […]

My America

admin January 27, 2021 No Comments

It’s been a week since that other guy left the White House. It’s been three weeks since he sent his mob of thugs to the Capitol. I hate that other guy. This new guy, Joe, well, he’s been a bit of a salve on this nation. He isn’t a miracle worker, but I have noticed […]

Hi

admin January 18, 2021 No Comments

Since way back in the days when I was doing stand-up comedy I looked for rudymartinez.com. It was not available. Dot net was taken by an actor. He’s got a cool name and he’s been on things I like so, I can’t hate on him. Every so often I would check again. And again. From […]

A Boy and His Dog

admin January 18, 2021 No Comments

Once upon a time there was a boy. He had a dog. His dog was an asshole that shat everywhere and peed on the boy’s shoes. This dog was a total cunt of a dog. This is his story. This asshole keeps calling me Carl. My name is not Carl, my name is William, not […]

All The Pretty Boys

admin January 18, 2021 No Comments

Don’t pick that up, he said. His pace quickened. That’s when I saw my buddy Peter and a few other boys I barely recognized sitting on the wall. The barely recognizable boys were all from the continuation school down the street from our school. Hey Peter! I got out as my Uncle Charlie shuffled me down […]

A Cup of Coffee

admin January 18, 2021 No Comments

Don’t. A small word, don’t. He reached out to touch her shoulder. Don’t, she said. Mix it in with a few other words and it can be a saving grace… You don’t have cancer. …or a soul crushing mallet. I don’t love you. We spent all night making drunk love to each other and woke to […]